“Dear Mr Antonioni:
I recently screened your classic film, The Red Desert, starring Monica Vitti and Richard Harris. I have a problem with the way you used screen space. My theaters screen is big and wide. It is capable of handling many actors at the same time. For instance, crowd scenes and battle scenes work well. But in your movie there are only a few actors and many times they are pictured in one corner of the screen or another, against a stark minimalist background. This is a terrible waste of screen space.
Funny stuff. But then I don’t go to the cinema to pay my gas bill. Horses-for-courses. I have a feeling that my “If Post-Offices where like Cinemas” essay wouldn’t be nearly as amusing.